Blogdom: Not all it's cracked up to be

Recently, it seems that a plague of lies, manipulation, fraud, and stuff that is just plain sick has broken out upon the blogging world. Photos have been stolen off of mommy blogger websites (read this warning here to see how terrible a situation like this could end up), several websites have been found to be complete lies (see here), and it seems that a war has broken out between followers of a very popular blog (related to the April Rose mess). After reading some of the comments on a website set up to "dispel the drama" of this woman, I'm just heartbroken- that ladies who profess to be Christians could gather at this place and tear down a person who they've never even met, using some of the most perverse language I've ever heard. Many of these ladies (well I'll use the term woman since their behavior certainly disqualifies them from being referred to as ladies) remark of having husbands and small children. Where are they while their wives and mothers are busy participating in this horrid "witch hunt" (as I've seen it termed on said website)?

Some of these women speak of letting their children sit in front of the television for hours while they spend time searching out the faults of others. One woman even mentioned that she let her child use the b*a*t*h*r*o*o*m (asterisks added for protection from search engines) on the floor while she spent time on the computer. HUH?

As professing Christians we are to live as examples to a world that has no hope. We are CERTAINLY not supposed to be spending all day on the Internet using foul language with spiteful hearts while neglecting our families.

I'm signing off now- maybe for a while. My son is growing up so fast. I can't believe he's already 2.5 months old! I want to spend as much time as possible cuddling with him, making him laugh, being his mommy... I want him to see the joy of the LORD in me- not a hateful spirit. So I'm leaving blogdom for a while. Maybe a week, maybe a month, I may just delete the entire thing.

I'll leave you with this:

An Update

I had a few posts scheduled to run this week (including a 2 month update on Samuel) but my computer was hacked and infected by a worm sometime late Sunday night. Quite a bit of information (pictures, files, music...) was corrupted and stolen. I'm still doing damage control, but I hope to be back to blogging by early next week.

In the meantime- please be careful with the content on this blog as well as my facebook page. My username and passwords were hacked and even though they've been changed and I've battled it out on MS-DOS and disinfected my computer, there is still a tiny chance that the hackers could use the info they have to hack into my accounts. Will post an all clear soon.

Happy Anniversary to Us!

Eighteen months ago...

Now...

Lots of changes, no?

Eighteen months may seem strange to celebrate, but I usually always try to do something a little special on the 28th of each month just to celebrate our marriage. For our big 18 I bought my DH a coffee maker, coffee, flavored creamer ect... All this time and I just found out that he even likes coffee!

Loving being married, and so excited about what the future holds.

Tips for New Parents from the Parents of 18

I just came across this list of 10 tips for new parents, written by Michelle and Jim Bob Duggar for their oldest son and his wife who are expecting their first child. I know that the Duggar family is not perfect (are any of us?) but they have a great marriage and have raised 18 wonderful, respectful children who are truly a joy to be around. I respect their beliefs, family values, and overall testimony.

Without further ado:

10) Parenting brings some of the greatest joys in life, but it will also keep you on your knees in prayer.

9) Keep dating each other, even after you have children. The stronger your marriage, the closer your family will be.

8) Don't be a perfectionist, military drill sergeant to your children. Praise your children 10 times more than you correct them.

7) Your children will learn more from what you do than what you say. Lead by example!

6) Realize that each one of us makes mistakes everyday and we must be willing to quickly humble ourselves and ask for forgiveness and make things
right.

5) Hold everyone lovingly accountable. Gently respond when anyone speaks with sharp words, harshness or anger and make them aware of their tone.

4) Don't be self-centered or put others down. Concentrate on talking with a soft tone and showing acts of kindness to each other.

3) Turn off the computer, TV, and video games and spend time as a family looking for opportunities to invest in the lives of others in need.

2) You will never regret spending too much time together. Make fun memories; enjoy the time
that you have with your children because they grow up fast!

1) True success comes as you love God and treat others as you want to be treated.

There are many of these that I need to work on. Number 4 is my greatest struggle. I can be a very self-centered and rude person. I also don't focus near enough on keeping a soft tone or a good attitude. I often use sharp words. But I'm so glad that I found this list! It helped make me aware that there are things in my life that will hinder my relationship with my family. I truly treasure the advice of such seasoned and successful parents.

The Long Journey

I'm so glad that all of you who keep up with this blog found my tiny corner of the blogosphere. To be honest- I know that there's not a whole lot here to interest anyone. I'm not a splendid writer. I only update sporadically. But I like having something to look back at and remember. It's kind of like a scrapbook of my long journey. For the most part it's just beginning, but for those of you who don't know the very beginning we'll need to go back a ways...

I was born in the mid 80's to a feminist/workoholic mother and a lady loving/workoholic father. I was the first and only child of the marriage. My mother lived for her career and the addiction to proving that she could indeed run a company better than a man. My father lived for wealth and the joys (and sorrows) that came with it. I was raised by sitters and daycare workers. I was extremely introverted as a child. I learned to read when I was 3 and a half by listening to books on tape and following along. From then on I was hooked on literature, and I found friends in books. My parents divorced the Christmas before I turned 4.

Being an only child (for the time being) of a working single mother taught me to be very independent. When I was in kindergarten I was waking up by myself in the mornings, dressing myself, and making my own lunch. I loved school and hated the summertime, not because I missed my friends (didn't have many) but because I didn't have access to the library.

My mother remarried when I was 7 and promptly had two more children, eleven months apart. She was nearly 35 and wanted to have children before it was too late. She (of course) didn't give up her career but instead worked harder to ensure that we would have a great life and future. For the time being we did. We lived in a nice home, had new vehicles, the nicest clothes (I had quite a few outfits that cost $200 or more) and we went on great vacations. But we were unhappy. I was especially unhappy.

I was a very moral person. I never got into trouble. I made straight A's. I was in AP and Honors classes. I had gained a lot of confidence and even had my first boyfriend. But something very big was missing in my life.

As I got older and got more freedom from my parents I began searching for that something that was missing. I thought that it was fun and excitement and freedom and all those things that I had missed out on while being a "good girl". My mother divorced again around this time and since she was preoccupied with other problems I pretty much had free reign to do what I wanted. Though I had been raised in a Southern Baptist church I quit going. A few people asked me why and I told them without even blinking: "It's a lie. It's all a big fairy tale. I'm tired of pretending, and I like having my Sunday's to myself. Deep in your hearts you know that I'm right but you still care enough about what people think to keep up the show. I don't."

I had assumed that when I reached this zenith of freedom that I would feel...free. But I didn't. I felt more in bondage than ever to the feeling that something was missing. I was terribly depressed. I was only 15 years old and I felt like life wasn't worth living.

My mother remarried again, but this time to a wonderful man. They began to attend church together and invited me to go with them. I refused. Then one night my mom came home from church and she was different. Really different. For the first time in my life I felt like she actually cared more for her children than her job. And she was HAPPY. No.... more than that. She had joy. She tried to tell me a few times what happened but I didn't want to hear any of it. She told me that she had been saved. "Saved from what?" I asked. Sin. Sin? Well I didn't need to be saved from sin. I was still a very moral person. I didn't drink, didn't smoke, didn't do drugs and I gave money to Red Cross. I certainly didn't sin. I was much better than my teenage counterparts. Besides, I didn't believe in God and I had no need to hear another bit of fairytale.

The same change that happened in my mom's life happened in the life of my stepfather. I sat back and watched all of this, not asking questions, just studying with the determination to trip them up- to prove that it was all a lie. That summer my mom came to me with a request. She wanted me to quit public high school. I agreed- I could graduate sooner from a private school and my credits would carry more weight since all of my classes were AP. That was all part of my goal- to get into the pre-law program of my top college choice and get away from the Bible-thumping Christians that my parents had become. We began looking for private Christian schools and found a few that we liked. I began the application process and was shocked to find that none of them would take me. Why? Because on each application they asked for a "testimony". What did I write? My convictions of course! I stood on my position that there in fact was not a God, and they stood on theirs that they wouldn't admit a non-Christian. Even with my straight A average.

Hmmm... what to do now? I really didn't want to go back to public school. I had my heart set on graduating early. My mother came to me again with another request. She wanted to give up her job and homeschool me. What?? It blew my mind. This woman had worked her entire life to have the job that she had. I took her up on her offer, not because I was thrilled at the thought of homeschooling (I wasn't) but because I wanted to see if she would really do it. She did.

I began Abeka video that year and loved it. I was learning (my favorite thing to do) and I was challenged and I didn't have to put up with the drama of public school. One thing I didn't count on was how much I would actually like my Bible classes. I mean, these people were actually intelligent! They were actually sane. And they had valid arguments that backed up the Word of God and proved His existence and the existence and deity of Jesus Christ.

I was still sceptical, but I began attending church with my parents. It was so much more than the way religion had been portrayed to me as I was growing up. I finally realized that to some people- God was real. They lived it. They went to church because they wanted to learn more about Him, not to save face and stuff themselves with Sunday suppers.

A year passed and I was still attending church, and even going to a few special meetings around the area. I began reading in earnest the Bible that my mother gave me for my birthday. I wanted to settle it once and for all. I was going to gather all of the evidence. I was going to analyze everything that I had read or heard and finally come to a final decision about what I believed. As I read I began to realize what I had been missing. I had been so self centered. I wrongly assumed that my decision would actually make a difference. I realized that regardless of what I believed God was real. And regardless of my doubt, He would still be real. He would still be God- even if I didn't believe. And for the very first time in my life I understood the crux of the matter. Even if I didn't believe, He would still love me.

When that thought began unfolding itself to me everything else fell into place. I began devouring the Bible. I finally believed that it was the real Word of the real God and I was determined to find out what He had to say. A new truth took shape in my mind. Even if I rejected the salvation that was available in Christ, He still died for me. He was mocked for me. He was beaten for me. And he rose again for me. Even though I didn't deserve it. Even though in my ignorance and rebellion I didn't even want it. It was still for me. It was still for all.

And there, at that moment, a sad and scared and dejected 16 year old girl realized that she was indeed a sinner. That though she didn't deserve the pardon of Christ's blood, that she could accept it and finally find what she had been searching for. Peace. Love. Joy.

It's been over six years since that day. It's still real.

I'm now happily married to a preacher/missionary. We have been exceedingly blessed. We have an adorable son. We're finishing college and heading to the mission field as soon as God opens the door. It's so much more than I ever imagined. Even when I took that tiny leap of faith, I never knew just how deep the love of God is.

The love of God is greater far
Than tongue or pen can ever tell;
It goes beyond the highest star,
And reaches to the lowest hell;
The guilty pair, bowed down with care,
God gave His Son to win;
His erring child He reconciled,
And pardoned from his sin.


When years of time shall pass away,
And earthly thrones and kingdoms fall,
When men, who here refuse to pray,
On rocks and hills and mountains call,
God’s love so sure, shall still endure,
All measureless and strong;
Redeeming grace to Adam’s race—
The saints’ and angels’ song.

Could we with ink the ocean fill,
And were the skies of parchment made,
Were every stalk on earth a quill,
And every man a scribe by trade,
To write the love of God above,
Would drain the ocean dry.
Nor could the scroll contain the whole,
Though stretched from sky to sky.

O love of God, how rich and pure!
How measureless and strong!
It shall forevermore endure
The saints’ and angels’ song.

Nellie's Naturals Giveaway

My friend Tiffany at All That Blooms is hosting a great giveaway at her blog. The take? A 50 load package of Nellie's Naturals laundry detergent and a package of two dryer balls. Go check it out!

Life as it is...now

Life with a newborn never ceases to amaze me. Sometimes I feel like I've been on a five week comedy tour and other times I feel like I've been plunged into the depths of despair. An example: Yesterday while Samuel was eating, he peed through his diaper, his clothes, and my knit skirt. Because of his infant reflux he has to eat sitting upright and remain upright for 30 minutes after he's finished. I wasn't going to leave wet clothes on him for another 35 or so minutes so I undressed him while he was sitting on my lap and I took off his diaper. I assumed that since he had just done his business that he would be finished for a little while so I didn't attempt to put another diaper on him while he was sitting upright. He continued eating and 2 or 3 minutes later I felt something warm on my leg. It was poo. Yeah...tell me about it.

My usually obsessive compulsive self has learned a few lessons about letting things go. The realization hit me the hardest a few nights ago. While I was changing Samuel he wet on our bed. He really wet on the bed- a puddle full. Instead of changing the sheets like one normally would... well, I just soaked up what I could with a towel, laid down another towel over the spot, and I went to sleep. I was in survival mode: sleep or die. This morning when I woke up at 5 to feed Samuel his early morning breakfast and when I looked down into his bassinet I realized that during one of the night feedings when I changed him I didn't put his pants back on. So there he was- just a shirt and one sock. And a full diaper of course.

I'm looking forward to my weekly Friday date night with hubby. It'll be be the first time this week that my hair hasn't been in a ponytail (yep, learned that lesson quick- spit up doesn't make a very good conditioning treatment). Our usual date night usually goes as follows: drop Samuel at Grandma's, grab a quick fast food meal, pick up an animated flix from Redbox, cuddle up and watch 30 minutes of it before falling asleep around 9, sleep ten straight hours. It's so romantic. Seriously! On a side note: Last week's movie was Despereaux and I thought it was a bit dark and disturbing for children. For example- a servant considers murdering the princess with a butcher knife and later said princess is almost eaten alive by rats. Just so you know.